TAXI CAB CONFESSIONS # 5

I used to drive a taxi/cab. Why? I often ask myself that, it was a shitty job, but it got me through 2 years of university, so it served a purpose. I was telling a few stories from those days to a friend recently and it got me thinking that I should write these stories down before I forget them.

Yo Bro

"Hey bro, we just goin round the corner and back hey!"

I'm in the rank outside the Bog bar/nightclub, 3 of the biggest Maori dudes I have ever seen slide/plonk/plunk/thump into the seats of my cab. I seriously believe I heard the cars suspension grunt!

"Sure, just point the way"

These guys seem like gentle giants, we exchange pleasantries. Man, could those boys fill out a seat.

We go about 10 blocks, then down an alley :gulp: and end up out the back of what I think is a house.

"Just wait here for a minute bro, we wont be long"

Two of the three jump out.

The third one stays in the back.

"So you havin a good night bro?"

"Yeah not too bad, bit quiet, kinda............"

Suddenly from the house "Who do you think you are bitch"

I look front and center, the alpha Maori is charging through the door of the house, a blonde white girl runs out, bangs into the second Maori, spins around and heads back inside.

There's a heap of screaming and yelling coming from inside.

"Get the fuck out" she screams "You arseholes" yells a second girl.

Oh man I wanna be the hell outa here right now, other peoples domestic issues are not my business. Only problem is that now I have a 150kg tank sitting in the back seat. I'm not goin anywhere just now.

More yelling and name calling, then a really loud scream and the "tank" decides he best go see what's happening.

"Wont be a sec hey!"

Sure no probs" I reply

I was unaware that I could reverse a car down an alley way that fast. I couldn't get the hell out of there quick enough. Oh man, 3 angry Maoris and 2 pissed off white girls is not the kind of fare I wanted, especially when I'd have to tell them I couldn't carry 5 people.

The Bog was pretty much off limits to me for about 6 months after that. You never knew when the car door was gonna open and you'd hear...

"You dat bro that left us in the alley hey!"

Oh shit!!!

You can read the other stories in the series so far by clicking the taxi label below

Comments